HEALING OUR FAMILIES
Probably the most difficult lessons we have to learn during our lifetime are taught to us by our biological families. Caroline Myss places family or 'tribal' issues in our root chakra. This chakra, located at the base of the spine, is thought to be the chakra most relevant to our being 'grounded' in this world. The information it contains is all about the belief systems we learned from our families in our very early life, many of them so ingrained in our subconscious mind that they are automatic and hard to let go of. Some may be serving us well. If we were loved unconditionally as a baby, that would be a wonderful belief system -- we would grow up feeling worthy of unconditional love. But what if we were unwanted, or told we would never amount to anything? We would grow up sabatoging most every project we started because unconsciously we 'knew' we could never succeed. We have countless belief systems concerning everything from money to food. Some we have embodied as negative that may not have been ill-intended, but were interpreted by the young mind in a negative way!
Myss relates to us that we 'chose' our birth family to motivate us to develop enough strength of character to 'pick up our bed and walk'. That leaves many of us trying to 'heal' with our parents in later life - often when we are struggling to raise our own children. Nothing seems to teach us as efficiently about our parents than being parents! We gradually begin to let go of things that are not peaceful in our hearts - and ill feelings about our parents are frequently at the top of the list...
And what about our significant other? In the esoteric writings (Laws of the Universe), we read about how those around us 'mirror' for us the issues that we are refusing to let go of. Who better to be our closest mirror than the one we have chosen to live with? Being in a mindful relationship and practicing the principles of non-violentcommunication as taught by Marshall Rosenberg and HeartMath's heart-centered communication, is one of the best practice fields for learning about ourselves and learning about being at peace in our hearts. Debbie Ford takes it one step further and even speaks to Spiritual Divorce!
Another thing that is occurring at this time in history, is a decrease in the 'domination' paradigm, and an increase in the 'partnership' paradigm. Many more women are stepping into their role as an equal partner within a marriage, and many more couples are opting to not even get married. High percentages of divorce indicate an unwillingness to stay within a union that is not satisfying the needs of both parties. An instance of this may be when one partner is determined to pursue a personal growth path and the other one does not want to. Often the results are that the marriage will end and the individuals will go off to seek new partners that are in a more similar place in their personal/spiritual growth.
There are also some experts saying some very special children are being born now, actually for about the last 25 years - The Indigo Children. These children have a head start in personal growth. They are born knowing 'who they are', and make it very difficult on anyone who is not being truthful with them. It is theorized that part of why they have such difficulty with the school system (and probably why so many of them are on Ritalin), is because they intuitively 'know' what is important, and that is not what they are being taught! And their parents? Loving unconditionally is the lesson these children are teaching us, so anything short of that they will 'demand'!!
Though perhaps the toughest of our lessons, healing within the family is also the most rewarding. Certainly worth the effort. After all, if we can't get along with our nearest and dearest, how do we ever expect to have peace in the world.